Reviewed by OHS Student, Katherine Z.
In this memoir addressed to women, survivors, writers, and readers, Jeannine Atkins documents her journey to unravel the emotions and relationships in trauma’s aftermath. The book is written and reflected on in verse; it presents the lessons learned by the author from each person in her life – and from herself.
This book is incredibly immersive for being a memoir – everything was visible in the mind, and many verses hit painfully and deeply in a relatable way. The intentional ambiguity of Atkins’ diction was very thought-provoking as well.
This novel is incredible for those drawn to themes of psychology, social behavior, and seeking healing & closure. This novel really makes you think about how every single person has untold experiences and struggles – but also healing and hope are possible.
Things that work well for the book:
Authenticity – sometimes the chronology feels like a blur, or perhaps a misrecalled memory; there were also repeated descriptions and motifs (deja vu); the author doesn’t go too in-depth when writing about other people and describes them in similar ways; these all add to the relatability of one’s mental state being so off that days, people, and experiences blend together.
Subtle theme of ‘hidden dangers’ – things that make you think “this wont happen to me,” or “this isn’t hurting me” until you realize too late; shows how simple yet unpredictable people are – I personally enjoy seeing this in literature; allusions that mean even more if you know about them (Icarus, Sylvia Plath, Ruby Bridges, Picasso, Guernica, Monet, etc.)
Favorite Lines:
She won’t know that ill always remember her. (273)
I don’t fit in my body and I don’t want to have one. (26)
I’d looked out for us. that wasn’t wrong. (31)
A pillow. a brick. breath ending. (34)
Where a boy fell, feathers and waxen wings on fire. no one looked up. everyone was busy. (38)
I miss stumbling into moments when a girl in a book seemed to become me. (50)
We think we want an ending but mean a victory. (103)
While rocks are battered by waves, sand ever so slowly, beautifully crumbles. (229)
The only proof she fought hard enough is if she’s dead. (233)
It was hard, never getting enough sleep, but I loved holding a life in my arms. (236)
Things that do not work well for the book:
The timeline was somewhat confusing, but I did say I liked this part because it may have been intentional. It also allows for parallels to be made between reality/fiction and people.
